Tuesday, July 21, 2009

OK, I think I'm onto something big here

We all know the Mets farm system is pretty dry. Binghamton and Buffalo seem to get blitzed by the opposition every day. Blue chip prospects are few and far between.

And our major leaguers aren't exactly tearing it up either. If we want to be "sellers" at the trade deadline, there's not much talent to be moved, at least not talent that is likely to spend more time on the diamond than in the trainer's room.

But the Mets do have one asset that should be marketable:

Former players.

Why not trade the rights to our former greats' careers for the current players we're so dearly lacking?

Now I know what you're thinking: "why would the Rockies want to trade good young talent for Tom Seaver? The guy's a senior citizen and probably couldn't have maintained an ERA under 3.00 at Coors Field, even in his playing days. After all, there's no GRAVITY in that park."

But that's not the point.

Rockies fans have no history. They've been a franchise since the '90s. That's embarrasing. They should just be embarrased. People born around the same time as their franchise think that Miley Ray Cyrus is a vocal phenomenon. Most people born in the '90s are still tring to pretend they're drinking age (or else just realize no one would buy it). That's no baseball franchise. Maybe it could pass for respectable in the Arena Football League.

These people need to buy some baseball cred. They keep their baseballs in a humidor, for Pete's sake.

That's where we come in. Now, I don't suppose they'll send us Helton in this deal, but why not Jeff Francis? I mean, Colorado's in the hunt for the Wild Card, and Francis hasn't pitched all season. They don't NEED him.

But look behind curtain #2, Colorado. 311 wins. 3,640 Ks. 3 NL Cy Youngs. Yeah, like you'll EVER have a pitcher come close to any of those numbers in your lunar colisseum.

This is a win-win for everybody. The Mets get a good young pitcher to help us next year, when we might have a chance. All we have to do is peel that ole #41 jersey off the wall, box it and ship it. The Rox get a legitimate pitching star. Decades of baseball history. A piece of a World Series championship. And some really intimidating stats for their franchise records.

And maybe if the Rox front office is feeling generous, they'll let us keep his name in the back of the yearbook somewhere.

Think about it, Rockies, just think about it.

3 comments:

Fredo said...

You realize this is a joke, right?

I'm just trying to figure out if the silence means it wasn't funny or you thought I was serious.

SheaHeyKid said...

You realize this is a joke, right?

What? I was already drawing up plans to give them rights to Dykstra too.

Beetz McDogg said...

Hey don't laugh Lenny could really use the money now since he just declared bankruptsy